the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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