Barsexuality is the new black.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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