He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Randomize
