So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Randomize
