We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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