after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
