I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize
