You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Mom said you looked used
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Randomize