She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize