I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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