Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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