i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
My orgasm happened in two different decades
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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