After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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