Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
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