your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Randomize
