Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
