You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
