Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Just pee around me
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Randomize
