Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
do nipples grow back?
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
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