I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
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