Slut skills are useful in every country.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
