...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
