i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize