i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
