your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
