and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
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