i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Randomize