talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize
