dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
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