Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
