found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
