I hate all girls vehemently.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
We have started to decorate penises.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
