If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
