This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
