As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
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