i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize