1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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