it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
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