Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
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