It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
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