Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
We are two peas in an std pod
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
