life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Randomize
