You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
