I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize