There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Randomize