i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize
