i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
