u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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