so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
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