He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize