His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...