Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
10 Things Your Gyno Wants You To Stop Doing To Your Vagina
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
For Some Reason, Boys Are Singing The ‘Halo’ Theme Song In School Bathrooms
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.