i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
