Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize
